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7:01 AM - Thursday, Jun. 02, 2011 How does someone say they understand how you feel in one breath but in the next tells you how hard their life is now that they have to take care of themselves? How does someone say they still want you but then uses you and care more about their wellbeing then yours? Its a a cycle I have let myself fall into. I wanted to be a good woman to him to only end up being his provider. He mooched off me and used me and I allowed it. So I'm not a victim but now I have to make sure to stay away. I want to hope for the best but in the few days I have moved out I havent seen anything truely different on his part. Everything is poor Wayne(alex)all the time. Yesterday he went so far to tell me that he will let NOTHING get in his way of finishing culinary school. That all this stuff that's been happening over a week and a half has gotten him behind but he is determined to finish and its the only thing that has made him truely happy. It sure was a kick in the teeth. Especially since we were in the doc's office and I had just finished hearing my blood pressure had gone down. I just finished telling him that happy that my health wont effect my kid and he goes on this spiel with tears in his eyes. So it showed me how much he cares about me and our kid's welfare. you know I always sem to end up the loser... cant keep letting that happen.
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