3:12 PM - Saturday, Nov. 27, 2010
pretty big damn breakthrough
I think sometimes you need to lose it to get perspective. I lost Wed night. I mean seriously. I was yelling at the top of my lungs, breaking things, and stomping around slamming doors. I was soo mad! I was in a rage really. I just wanted to hurt someone or some thing.

But after I was done raging I just cried forever. I mean I keep crying till the middle of Thursday. Everything just hurt so much. It was so damn painful. I never want to feel like that and for the first time ever I didnt hide it from the person that helped cause that pain. I usually do and I think that was a pretty big moment for me. Granted I dont know if it will change anything with me and Alex but it did change me a bit. I allowed myself to cry for as long as I needed to. Granted I didnt know how to stop it either but I didnt hide it.

I think thats a pretty big damn breakthrough lol

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